Me. Wife. Mother. Friend.
These are just a few words that have been floating through my mind lately. We are in the process of buying our first house! Whew! It's not for the faint hearted, that's for sure. We are just waiting on one more thing. It seems like that has been all we've done the last month is hurry up and wait. It could still fall through, or it could work out at the very last moment. I'm an optimistic person, so I kind of see this as God's way of saying, "just watch me work. By the time this loan goes through, you won't have a shadow of doubt, that I (God) did it, in my own time, so that I could receive the glory from it!" I'm excited to see what happens (and a slight bit apprehensive, as well).
I don't like being in holding patterns. It makes me restless, and I often don't know what to do with my time. I just kind of maintain the "mess"! Weeks of being in limbo has certainly taken a toll on me! Therefore, my housework has kind of stalled............I know, I should be packing, but I don't want to waste too much of my time packing boxes, then have to turn around and unpack them. There is also a possibility that we will have most of the month of May to move, so I still have plenty of time. However that excuse doesn't really work for laundry....so I'm not sure why there is still a massive pile out there waiting on me!
Seems as if I'm in another holding pattern as a person and mother. Who am I? I got some free time yesterday, so I went browsing in all the upscale shops down town. It was fun, but I honestly wasn't sure what I liked. It felt awkward to go around window shopping like I was a single person again! Weird!! Sometimes I think I'm in a holding pattern of what "I" want to be or do, just waiting for my children to grow up. In reality, I need to find myself and be that person, while my children are growing up.
I think as moms, we forget what we are individuals. We (myself included!) stuff our dreams and desires away, just until we get our children raised. Sometimes, I think we need to get the dreams out and dust them off, and explore the world outside of the four walls we call home. Because in reality, the experiences we encounter now while raising our kids, are changing us as people. They shape us into what we become later on.
Well I have lots to contemplate, so I will wrap this up. Dusting off dreams (they've got to be around somewhere!), throwing off the holding pattern (guess we really need clean clothes before we move!), becoming the person that God created me to be (help me Heavenly Father, I'm a little lost on this one! Show me!).
Spontaneous wife. Crazy friend. Loving mother.
Blessings...................
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